Friday, January 7, 2011

This is Karnataka

Yes, its been a while. Perhaps because I tend to make the monumental effort of logging in to blogger and writing only when I'm monumentally pissed off, which I am right now.

The incident, for your benefit-
Aqseer is cruising down the road on Juno at a leisurely 30 km an hour. Flicks on the indicator to take turn into hostel gate. Sees small maroon car in rear view mirror, within touching distance. Slows down so crazed man who is blind to indicators can overtake. Man starts honking LIKE A MANIAC. (Aqseer)Stops completely (Punjabi blood, plus it would have been dangerous to turn), drops jacket. Turns around and yells at the man, tells him to pick it up since he's blind to indicators and such. Says this in ENGLISH. Man replies in Kannada. Several people around start honking. Turns, parks, picks up jacket and man is mysteriously still there, blocking the road, yelling in Kannada. Yells- I DON'T SPEAK KANNADA.
Man yells- THIS IS KARNATAKA. I says- (I'm feeling a bit sheepish about this, but I guess thats what happens when you study THREE courses in constitutional law) What do you mean this is Karnataka, haven't you read the Constitution? Man says- (hehe) Laaiiars (lawyers). I say- just go away *@#@$##$#%^^^#$@. And he does.

I have now resolved never to learn Kannada. Good going, language chauvinists.

How much nicer it would be if you could put across the beauty of your language and that it would make you happy if we showed some love for the state in which we currently have the pleasure of residing. Maybe if you gently taught us some swear words (which is all anyone learning a new language wants to know), followed by some handy words like bega, jasti bega, kodi, madi etc. BUT NO. Fine. Yell at me.

I'd rather chop off each individual digit on my hands and fry em in a pan than learn your language.

:)

8 comments:

Keerti said...

So cute little aqseer :) i just feel like pulling your cheeks. You're such a cute little fur ball. (Without the fur)

You get the point. So cute!

Deepika said...

What you witnessed isn't Karnataka. It's just a random guy who can be there in any state, speaking any language.
Plus, RESOLVING never to learn the language because of this one incident is just a knee jerk reaction and putting the blame on the entire state and its people is unjustified.

Aqseer said...

Er, Deepika, I didn't pin the blame on the entire state or anything.
I am very aware of that and actually somewhat insulted that you think I'd have the audacity to blame and entire state and its people because of a few language chauvinists.
I believe I was rather clear that this post is about language chauvinists, not about kannadigas in general.
"This is Karnataka" is what THAT MAN said. I understand its capable of being misconstrued, but I was merely quoting him.

Haha, Keedi. Shutap. :*

anurupa said...

Hahaha i just got here at work and obviously my first task of the day was read your blog :P
Love it. Especially cz where i work my number one job is to deal with overrich extremely spoilt bestowed with an Audi when they were 16 by their parents kinda bratty kids, and front desk jobs can be sooooo much fun.
Perfect post to get me started for the day, also yeah fuck that. Fuck those language chauvinists.
Love you aQ
Anu .

Captain Aloof said...

Love the sentiment but just to state the obvious: no one gives a shit if you don't learn the language, unless you were planning to pen a Kannada epic or something; even then I doubt the demographic in question would really care. Either way, it only affects you.
Cheers!

UDit said...

This is madness...

Madness? This is KANNADA!

Aqseer Baby, love the attitude you showed. Brings back lots of fond and some not-so-fond memories. :-)

Stay like this forever. And do learn Kannada just to show that language chauvinist that you can kick his ass at anything, even Kannada. :-D

Aqseer said...

Ud- Not so fond. Hahaha. Hehe. I should come with a statutory warning eh? Hm, you're right. I might just :)

shankar said...

what a childish rant ! Grow up. By talking about your so called punjabi blood, you are reinforcing the stereotypes which you oppose.

What if a punjabi guy rapes a girl and then blames it on his punjabi blood ?

Did you expect the car driver in bangalore to talk to you in punjabi or latin & exchange pleasantries? you are in bangalore & kannada is the state language & language of communication here..(read up teh constitution. Kannada is the official 7 state language of karnataka )